Saints, Then Sinners

What with me devoting so much of my time in Kolkata to the major religions -- hanging out with Muslims, Christians, and Hindus -- the universe must have thought I was spending way too much time in the company of the sacred and the saints. So it conspired to balance things out, by throwing a sinner my way.

By noon, just a few hours after the Ramazan celebration which brought hundreds of thousands of Muslims out into the streets of Kolkata, the devotees had dispersed, and the same road and its adjoining park were mostly deserted. I am meandering through the park, doing my usual routine of stopping to take pictures of flowers and sheep (at right), when I sense that I am being followed. I speed up. He speeds up. I slow down. He slows down.

I stop and whirl around. A twenty-something guy in a red shirt stops also, just a few feet behind me, and stares at me boldly. "What do you want"? I ask. "Why are you following me?" He mutters something in Bengali. The only word I can understand is "photo." "No photo. I don't want your photo. Leave me alone." I continue walking and he continues following closely behind. I sit down on a park bench and pretend to read, hoping he'll get bored and disappear. He sidles up next to me and stands there, fidgeting. After 10-15 minutes, he shows no sign of moving on. I look up and look him in the eyes. "Get away from me! Get the hell out of here! I'm not taking your picture!" He sticks his tongue out of his mouth and slowly moves it over his lips, moving his eyes suggestively downward. When I look "downward" I find that he has pulled his weenie out of his pants and is pointing it at me, clutching it with both hands. I burst out laughing. "So small?" I say, bringing two fingers together to indicate size.

Yeah, I know, insulting a potential rapist is probably not a smart move. But the absurdity was just too much for me to hold back the laughter. The tongue action looked like something out of a bad porn flick. And he was clutching his pathetic little treasure like it was a gold brick, as if he expected me to be dazzled by it! I assume that shock and fear were the reactions he was aiming for, and I wasn't about to satisfy him with either. Shock and fear, no. Rage, yes. In the next split second, the thought crosses my mind that he could have a knife, and then my amusement turns to rage. And I do what they teach you to do in self-defense class 101: make noise. I turn to him and start yelling, not a frightened, little girl scream, but a guttural voice that comes from somewhere deep down in my belly. It doesn't even sound like my voice at all, not even to my ears. No need to repeat here what I screamed; much of it was probably unintelligible and nonsensical. Suffice it to say that it was a multilingual (English, Polish, and Tamil) stream of every rageful word that came to mind. He steps back just a bit, looking confused. I push him back with my arms, lashing out at him on his shoulders, chest, and back. After a few moments of indecision, he turns on his heels and runs off into the park.

What would Kali do?

I will forever have this one regret: that in that moment when his precious little treasure was only a few inches from my face, I didn't bend my knee and ram it into his groin. I bet that would have made Kali proud. They teach you that too in self-defense class, but somehow, in that rageful moment, I didn't have my wits about me. And that would have been a picture worth taking.

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This post is dedicated to the gutsy women of the Blank Noise Project. Blank Noise is a community project in India which aims to break the silence and intimidation surrounding eve-teasing on the streets of India. They do this by publicizing incidents of harassment, posting pictures of harassers on a blog, and staging street interventions which encourage women to be assertive in public spaces.

Comments

[Jen]

OMG Basia - I'm so glad you're OK!!!! I know you're tough and all but take care of yourself!!!!!
Jen (Former co-worker and housemate)

[Sister M]

yea, that's Kali coming in loud and strong- (I've seen T-shirts that say "What would Kali do?") And thank you for posting infor about the woman's group.

[Clare]

You DID do Kali proud! Grrrrrr!

[Misty]

Oh man!!! You should have taken a picture of his "treasure". Sad to say, this behavior is not unique to any specific place in the world. I read recently that Sweden has one of the highest documented rate of "flashers" in Europe. In 2 years here, I've been flashed 5 times.

Glad you were not hurt, though!

[Basia]

Jen: No worries...glad to see you're still on here :o)

Misty: Five times! Wow. I had no idea it was so prevalent in Sweden.

Clare: Yeah, I'd like to think so...

Meg: I need to get me one of those T-shirts!

[sowmya]

Bunch of jerks. I wish Bobbitisization was legal. Blank Noise is a fantastic project and a step in the right direction.

[rhoda alex]

sigh...men and their disgusting behaviour. kudos to you Basia for being so brave and for laughing at the rogue too. and most of all thanks for posting this experience. And whoa Sweden...!!